Beyonce’s Behind And Other Reasons I’m Not A Feminist…


There are many reasons for which I do not subscribe to the F word. So this is just one of them.

You may have noticed that Feminism is posh again. (Do people still say posh? I guess I do). There are many pop culture voices ringing the Fem-bell loudly like Beyoncé, Lena Dunham, Emma Watson and for the younger girls Tavi Gevinson. If I met these women I bet I’d really like them. They seem charismatic, likable, intelligent and well spoken and all of them are on a mission.

But modern feminism (can we all just admit?), has lost a bit of its sophistication. Sure there are some modern points to be made. I imagine being more qualified than a man and making less in wages than him in the work place would be frustrating. So I’ll give ya that.

However, lets face it, most of the current feminist quarrels have more to do with Beyoncé (being a wife and mom) having the right to twerk on stage, then it has to do with women’s equality in the workplace. The fight nowadays is about women in general having the right to sleep around just like men are allowed to do. It is mostly about sexual freedom and rights to do whatever we want regardless of its disgusting or perverted nature. Because hey, men get to do it, so so should women!

Now with all that in mind, lets look at Malala Yousafzai. The 17-year-old Pakistani girl who is currently fighting for the rights of girls to be educated in Pakistan. She was shot in the face for her cause and has won a Nobel Peace Prize for her courageousness. She doesn’t care about being allowed to wear a low-cut shirt, all she wants is to be able to be taught by a teacher in public. If you haven’t read about her, you should.

If feminism meant standing up for causes like this – ones that involve character and respect for our mind’s – I would walk around with a projected image of Feminist behind me everywhere I went.


It’s a legitimate cause.

Why isn’t sexual freedoms also legitimate?

Because, if all your friends jumped off a bridge, would you? (I wish I didn’t have to get all mothery on you, but you made me.)

Here is the modern-day logic of feminism. Men can sleep around, talk dirty, take their shirts off and act crass all they want and no one says boo. But when a woman does all those things, she is labelled a slut and told she is trashy. This is unfair, so therefore we should fight for the same rights that men have sexually.

Instead of raising the bar, we just lower it. Instead of standing taller and maintaining that kind of behaviour is below our level of good character as women, we just join them in the mire. We are essentially the equivalent of a younger, jealous sibling feeling left out because our older sibling gets to go out with friends and smoke.

As women we’ve just taken up smoking to prove a point about our independence. And it will feel great for a while…

…until we all die of lung cancer.

Why do we want to roll with the pigs? Why don’t we just start saying boo!?

Heres the thing. Not all men are piggy, crass, sex-addicted morons like the ones we as women seem to admire and want desperately to emulate without judgement. I know this because I’m married to a good one. And I know many other good ones too.

In fact the men that are not tasteless are the ones that are usually praised in the media (as they should be). We even like to call them hero’s, because instinctively we all know sexually loose and swingin’ men are kinda gross. In movies they are the ones we hate until they finally reform their ways at the end of the movie by becoming a one-woman-man.

But we still get surprised by the good men, don’t we? Because they are chivalrous and speak intelligently. They are poised and humble. They admit wrong and accept judgement for that wrong. They serve their families sacrificially and they use their voice to bring peace and encouragement to those around them. And we all love ’em when we meet ’em. As women this is the kind of men we want to marry. And it’s certainly the kind of men we want our daughters to marry. Am I right?

Women…wake up! This is the behaviour we ought to exhibit!

Exploiting our bodies is not trailblazing. I have no desire to take a bullet for twerking rights. Is this a worthy cause? In the grand scheme of life, troubles and freedoms, this is the great battle we are fighting?

So women…hear me now…

It’s time to unapologetically raise the bar.

About hisgracemygrowth

I am a wife and full-time mom of a boy and girl who are 13 months a part. I am a Christ-following woman who is striving to honor God in all my endeavours! I stumble often....but His Grace is sufficient!
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