Change has never come easy for me. I like to know whats comin’ around the corner. I like to be able to predict a situation before the situation fully makes itself known. Every now and then I get an itch and want to break free from the known routine and be spontaneous. But most of the time my life is lived under the motto shown to the left. I realize this reveals just how boring I am. It is a quality I like least in myself.
I am fascinated by woman who are willing to go anywhere, and do anything with no notice or preparation. Free-spirited woman inspire me to be different. But those woman are just not me. Call me a control freak all you want, I suppose I am, but at least I’m organized…(most of the time).
Motherhood however has been a crash course in rolling with the punch’s for me. If ever I was gonna learn how to let go a little easier, this would be the way. God knew that. And here I am in the middle of a life-long lesson of letting go. I am a mom, which means I need to be in control. I need to have rules and boundaries and my children need to take there que’s from me and their dad. But at the same time, I also need to change and grow as they change and grow. Adapting to new stages is part of the struggle.
And yet, Ben is two…which means he is most definitely terrible. Something he hasn’t always been. He is still sweet and I of course still love him to pieces. But non-the-less he is deep in this awful stage of screaming and crying and mood swings and food aversions and hitting and throwing and waking up in the middle of the night for no apparent reason. Some of these things I have been dealing with for a while with him. And some are totally new.
Part of parenting well is not being thrown off by all the new stuff. Because lets face it, from ages 1 to 5, newness is happening continuously. And I have been used to that so far.
But my son entering this two-year old stage has taken me off guard. I don’t know why, I should have seen it coming. I, like every other new mom in the world have been warned by loved-ones and strangers alike. I am learning to adapt to this new stage in the life of my son, and by default, in the life of me. It is nuts, but it is getting better already. However I feel as though this may be a long year of many adjustments to our parenting plan. There will probably be some tweaking here and there as we continue to learn as parents. And I am sure there will also be plenty of Ben-sized conniptions, followed up by some mommy-sized conniptions as well.
So here’s to a year of more changes…and learning to just roll-with-it! Cheers!